Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Mormons Do It Better, Part I

Disregard the title, I'm just biased... :) Seriously, this was the hardest post to name. My initial idea was, "Latter-Day Lovelies," but that made me want to die a little. I even asked some friends. Their suggestions ranged from too Mormony ("Too Hot for Moroni"), to corny ("Mormon Hotties: You Know You Lust Them"), to unintentionally dirty ("A Little Taste of Mormon"), to deliberately dirty ("Pretty Mormon Beaver").

ANYWHO, there are quite a few celebrities who are/used to be Mormon. Aaron Eckhart. David Archuleta. Ricky Schroeder (who Sasha Alexander had a crush on when she was younger...). But this post isn't about them... they're boys.

So, welcome to Part One of my Hot Mormons series (which also includes, well is mostly, people who were raised Mormon but are no longer affiliated with the LDS Church).

Julianne Hough
(Dancing With the Stars)
Julianne, Derek, and their other siblings were all raised Mormon in Sandy, Utah. And all of the other facts I learned about her are probably not interesting to the rest of you...
(She is very Mormon-looking... just sayin')

AJ Cook
(Criminal Minds)
AJ Cook met her husband at Utah Valley University and they lived in Salt Lake City for awhile.

Katherine Heigl
(Grey's Anatomy)
Her family converted after her brother died in a car accident when she was younger, but she is no longer a practicing Mormon.

Amy Adams
(Enchanted; Julie & Julia)
Amy was raised Mormon, but her family left the Church after her parents divorced. Although she said about her Mormon upbringing, "...it instilled in me a value system I still hold true. The basic 'Do unto others...', that was what was hammered into me. And love."

Eliza Dushku
Eliza was also raised Mormon, but is no longer practicing.

Christina Aguilera
Her parents met at BYU (holla!), but were no longer affiliated after they divorced when she was seven.

Monday, November 29, 2010

Kate Todd: Left For Dead

Homoerotic subtext galore in this episode! Which unfortunately means not very much Kibbs. (Note: I could have skewed some parts to still support Kibbs, but I'm having lesbian subtext withdrawal... Rizzoli & Isles needs to be back on my TV... now.
Second Note: Click the screencaps for the enlarged goodness)

*Some lady was buried alive, but she survived and knows that there is a bomb on a ship. Other than that, she has amnesia.
*Tibbs subtext: Tony knows where the TVs in Gibbs’ house are (i.e., whether or not there’s one in the bedroom…) and has stayed over before.
*Kate Todd goes to the hospital to check on the amnesia lady.

*This doctor is totally flirting with Kate Todd using Maura Isles-like random trivia. The problem: He's so not cute like Maura Isles is.

*How can anyone blame the guy for crushin' on Kate when she flashes a smile like this:
*In an attempt to find out the woman's identity, Kate fingerprints her.
But instead of having the woman wipe the ink off herself, she does it.
Oh, lezzie subtext, how I've missed you...
*In other news, Amnesia Lady slowly starts to remember things, like the fact that she likes blueberries.
*Ugh, now I recognize her... It's Anna Nardini. She had a stupid daughter that ruined lives on Gilmore Girls.
Hmm, she's hotter with long hair...
*Amnesia Lady: Why do you believe in me?

Kate Todd: Because I want to get in your pants, er, gown.
(What she really said: Why do you like blueberries?)
Hopefully because they're delicious and make you want to take your clothes off...
*Tony: What if the attacker returns?
Kate: She'll be in protective custody... at my place.
*Kate sends the woman off with the doctor to borrow some clothes to wear.
Kate: I'll join you in a minute.
I'm sure you will... *wink*
*Tony: Whoa! What's with you and Jane Doe?
(See, even Tony sees it. And it's Tony!)

Kate: She'll be occupying my spare bedroom so I don't have to say 'no' to you.
(Oh... "spare bedroom"... right.)

*Kate: Take my clothes... Actually, let me help you change...
Wait, that last part was just me.
*Random Kate Todd sexiness
*Jane Doe feels a little dizzy. Kate asks if she wants to go back to the hospital. Jane Doe instantly says, "No!"
Jane Doe: I think I'm just weak from hunger. I don't remember the last time I ate.
And this was seriously the look they shared after she said that:
So, Kate takes her to go eat.

*Jane Doe remembers that she has an ugly coat like Kate's.
That's one of the main reasons I prefer Maura over Kate. Besides being brilliant (not that Kate isn't smart, she is), Maura knows how to dress. 90% of Kate's wardrobe... not a fan.

*Jane Doe and Kate Todd have a romantic dinner.
Jane Doe: You've been wonderful to me. I do really appreciate it, Kate.
I'm sure she'll show her appreciation later...

*Jane Doe is not Jane Doe, but Suzanne. So, Suzanne goes and sees some corpse of a guy she killed and remembers it. But she lies to Kate. Not good for a relationship... just sayin'.
Gibbs: She didn't recognize the bald man?
Kate: No, all she felt was sympathy for him.
Oh, Kate... Blinded by lust.
Aaand Gibbs hangs up on Kate.
Don't worry, he's just jealous of you and Suzanne.
By the way, Kate, I would never hang up on you.

*Kate: There's plenty of time for a husband and kids, Suzanne.
Or, you know, a hot NCIS wife and kids.
Suzanne: The good ones are all married.
Kate's a little disappointed that Suzanne doesn't see what's right in front of her.

*Suzanne wants to go back to work.
Why do Sasha's characters always give in to pleading women?
Taking a crazy back to her workplace/leaving a dead body as a trap... same thing.

*So, Suzanne is being a crazy person and confronting her married former lover. Tony is too busy trying to get into Gibbs' bed to notice that Suzanne is a bucket full of crazy. Luckily, Kate is there.
*Suzanne blows everyone up!!
(I just couldn't put a screencap of Kate all sad and cold and post-bomb... It made me too depressed.)
*And for you Tibbs shippers:
Gibbs: My door's unlocked.
Tony: I know.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Sunday Morning Post

Monday, November 29
Alyson Hannigan will be on Ellen.
Come on, it's Willow. You have to watch.

And it's Janina Gavankar's birthday!
Happy Birthday, Papi!

Tuesday, November 30
Eva Mendes will be on Ellen.
Sexy Cuban... there ain't nothin' wrong with that.

Autumn Reeser will be on Jimmy Kimmel.
I've been watching No Ordinary Family too much... I forgot that Autumn is not only adorable, but can be ridiculously hot.

Also, Happy Birthday to Elisha Cuthbert!

Thursday, December 2
Alyson Hannigan will be on Jimmy Kimmel.

And it's Lucy Liu's birthday!
I've been watching Ally McBeal lately, so I'm a little obsessed with her (along with Calista Flockhart, Portia de Rossi, and Courtney Thorne-Smith... Man, there were a lot of hotties on that show...)

Friday, December 3
Happy Birthday, Julianne Moore!

Coming Tomorrow: Kate Todd

Friday, November 26, 2010

Girls With Guns, Part IX

Sofia Vergara
Kill shot!

Julie Benz
Not my favorite pic of Benz, but she's still hot.

Eva Mendes

Kyra Sedgwick
I LOVE Brenda Leigh Johnson!

Penelope Cruz
I honestly have no idea how I haven't posted Penelope before... She's gorgey and I LOVE Spaniards.

Sasha Alexander
Kate Todd at the shooting range.

Angie Harmon

Thursday, November 25, 2010

MormonLesbian's Thanksgiving Special

I would be remiss if I didn't take this Thanksgiving holiday as an opportunity to talk about what I'm grateful for.

*Rachel Shelley
Her smile is what helped me realize that I am really, really gay... Without her, I may still be stumbling blindly through life thinking I'm straight. Which would be really sad.

*My family. I have amazing parents. Even though certain aspects of my life would be easier if I had been adopted by any of the non-Mormon couples in my adoption agency, I would never, ever trade my parents in. Yes, it's concerning that my dad finds Ellen Degeneres and every other lesbian "disgusting" and my mom hides her face whenever a same-sex couple kisses on TV, which makes life awkward for me... But I would never have made it to this point in my life without them. My mom's my best friend. I tell her everything, well, almost everything. When I'm at school, I call her pretty much every day and we talk for at least an hour.
And I have the best brother in the world. Despite the seven year age difference, we've always been really close. When we were younger, he'd always give me the bigger ice cream scoop, he never picked on me, and was just awesome. And he's still awesome. When he was in Utah a few weeks ago, he drove an hour down to where I live just to take me to dinner and hang out. See, awesome.

*My sister and my best friend. So, she isn't my real sister. But she's been my real fake sister since I was five months old. She was the first person I came out to and has been so supportive.
And my bestie was the first really Mormon person I told. And she didn't move out of our condo or think less of me in any way. We've had sixteen hilarious years of friendship and I am super grateful for her.

*Sasha, Angie, JCap, and Sara.
And, well, Tess Gerritsen, Janet Tamaro, Shonda Rhimes, and the rest of the writers for making Rizzles and Calzona!
All of you have made my life better.

*My homo underground at school. Seriously, they are amazing. I mean, how else could I play "Five Gay Guys and a Dyke"? But really, I'm most grateful for my gay husband. Without him, I wouldn't have met those other fabulous people that make life at BYU bearable. Plus, he's amazing, caring, hilarious, and without him I wouldn't have anyone to make dirty jokes with. Our sexless marriage means so much to me :) (Look, I gave you more than just a vague mention! Feel special!)

*This blog. I don't know if you all know the story of how this blog came to be. Literally the day after I came out to my sister this summer, I went home and started this blog. I had one post where I talked about my feelings about coming out. And my very apropos horoscope for the day, which told me that I was embarking on a great adventure that day... Horoscopes are sometimes very accurate.
So, a couple of months later, I deleted that post and started the blog that exists today. I wanted it to be a blog that I wanted to read: a blog filled with hotties. Somehow "hotties" became Rizzles and Calzona.

(There was supposed to be some Calzona bed action in this too, but I deleted the wrong file and was left with this...)
Anywho, I really meant to have more diversity in my blog... but I don't hear you guys complaining... It's just been nice to have an excuse to search for pictures of hot women. And have a place where I can get serious as well and complain to strangers about my life.

*But this blog would be nothing without you guys. I've been astounded at how much support I have received from everyone. The encouragement I got before and after I came out to my class... Each and every one of you are AMAZING. Honestly, this blog and you awesome human being people have helped me, and continue to help me, be at peace with who I am.
These past few months I've been happier than I ever have in my whole life. Every morning, I'm excited for each new day. I used to be all kinds of dark and twisty like Meredith/Cristina (well, I still am a little) and the people in my life have noticed how I'm happier now. Which really makes me want to tell them it's because I'm gay--in both meanings of the word--and okay (yes, I did that just to rhyme... don't judge me).
I wish I could thank each of you personally. You all really have made my life better :D