Rizzles Recap: Living Proof

I was a little amused that this episode's called "Living Proof" like the movie Angie Harmon was in with Harry Connick Jr. and Bernadette Peters. Did I watch Living Proof just for Angie and her incredible hotness? Well, actually no. I also watched it because I'm a little bit in love with HCJ (he married Grace Adler!) and I'm a lot in love with Bernadette Peters (she's Karen Walker's sister!). But mostly it was for Angie.

*Anywho, the episode opens with some pregnant broad running through the woods before getting stabbed. And then saved by Mutton Chops Man.
*Someone's creepin' on Jane and Maura through the trees!

(Actually it's just me...)

The girls are having a romantic day at the spa... Couples' massage (which they engage in outside of the spa too...). Naked sauna time. Naked clay baths.


Jane: Spending 80 bucks to be submerged in Utah dirt is still a waste of money.

Well, Jane, if you're ever in Utah, come visit me and dirty fun can be had, minus the clay. And you can keep your money (as long as you keep being naked).

Maura: It's my gift to you.

Jane: Next time, just give me the cash.
Well, the traditional one year anniversary gift is paper...

Jane: I'm hungry.

Sitting next to a naked Maura would make me "hungry" too...
Unfortunately, Mutton Chop Man has to ruin their date with his screaming and his dead woman carrying...

The duo is able to get robed remarkably fast and Maura realizes that she can deliver the dead chick's baby.
Maura: I need your hand.

Oh, we know where you need Jane's hand... *wink* Oh, right. You actually need her hands to do some rather disgusting things.
Yeah, it is best to look away, Jane, because...

...there's a baby in her intestines! "What's he doing here?" (Well, the baby was actually in the proper place and Arizona Robbins was not there asking ridiculous questions...)

So, why was the pregnant chick just moseying about in the woods?
Jane: Maybe she was "out trolling for pickles."

Maura: 40% of pregnant women crave something sweet actually.
(Am I missing something? Doesn't that leave a whole 60% of pregnant women...?)

Jane: We'll find the baby daddy!

Maura: Okay! ... Let's flirt over this dead body for a bit first though.
*Meanwhile, back at the ranch...

Frankie: I thought you were at the, uh, arboretum at that spa place. How was it?
Awww, Frankie wants to make sure his sister had a good time on her date. Precious.

And apparently Angela is all up on Jane's business and bringing her lunch and whatnot...

I don't see why Jane's complaining about free food.
Jane: She's scrubbin' the grout with a toothbrush.
Ummm, how else are you supposed to clean the grout?

But painting Jane's place is a bit much...

Although obviously Jane should pick the mauve. (Did anyone else punch an intestine baby when Maura said, "Marmalade is the new black" or was it just me?)
Jane: This reminds me of the time that I asked for a bunk bed and you surprised me with a pink canopy.

Honey, mother knows best. Sleepovers are sooo much better when you're sharing the same bed.
*Jane threatens to punch Maura because Maura finds Angela endearing.

Kids, domestic violence is never the answer.
Maura distracts Jane with derricious stomach contents from the pregnant chick's autopsy.

Maura: You know, a stomach's contents are like someone's grocery bag--so revealing. It's my favorite part.
(That is actually my favorite game to play at Costco or the grocery store. The "Judge People Based On What's In Their Cart" game.)

Jane, do not give your girlfriend that look, especially when she's being exceptionally adorable!

Jane talks about visiting Baby JD and Maura confesses that she already visited him that morning.

Jane: Really? Are we getting...

Maura: Cravings for pickles? No.
Me: Praise Jesus! No more "pickles" for either of you, okay?

Frost pops in to take Jane to the dead chick's motel room.
As Jane leaves, Maura gives her the "I Crave Your Tuna" look:

*It turns out that Pregnant Chick was a surrogate.
Maura: She had quite robust reproductive organs.

Jane: Do you find that sexy in a woman? Robust reproductive organs?
Frost: First thing I look for. (Who doesn't love birthing hips and shiny uteri?)
(I was actually surprised that Maura didn't interject here with talk of men being predisposed, due to natural selection, to being attracted to women with certain physical characteristics that tend to indicate "robust reproductive organs.")
Anywho, they find out that Baby JD has parents.

Maura: Well, biological parents, not social parents; it's not the same thing. I was adopted. My real parents were the ones that raised raised me.
(Being adopted, this made me really happy, which is why I'm including the quote in this recap.)
*In other news, Frankie has been shadowing Korsak because he wants to be a detective like his big sis.
Jane: You two dating?

Frankie: Are you two dating?

(Okay, he didn't say that, but really...)
*Cut to Angela's yard sale at Jane's place.
Maura finds it simply adorable that Jane is "not very good at sales."

And Jane finds it interesting that Maura knows the exact retail price of a stroller.
Jane: How do we know that?
(My guess is that she grew up thinking her biological father is Bob Barker and she watched a lot of The Price is Right in an attempt to try and connect with him on some level.)

Apparently Maura was just looking at prices and such whilst shopping for other items on the Internet.
Jane: Well, stop. You don't have a baby.

Maura: Yet.
Jane: Babies aren't accessories.

Maura: I do not think they're accessories!
(Oh no, I can't bear to have another one of my favorite couples break up because of the baby disagreement...)

Maura pretends to love a painting because Angela painted it...

And Jane and Maura do a little eye flirting because of this.

Maura pays 500 bucks for it...

And Jane is touched (but not in the way we want to see her being touched...).

It's always good when your mother likes your girlfriend.

Maura shows Jane how you sell something at a yard sale.
Maura: It's more valuable the less it's played with...
(You really shouldn't judge people based on how many other people have played with them, Maura...)

Maura makes the sell.
Jane: Show-off.
(Maura does actually wink at Jane, but winks do not screencap well and I refuse to get involved with gifs)

*Jane Rizzoli says no to Crocs.

*Gratuitous hot face/boots screencaps:

*What she said: Your mother is the most wonderful kangaroo volunteer.

What she meant: Your mother is going to be the most wonderful grandmother to our children.

Yes, Jane, we are all as disturbed as you are...
*The team had ruled out Pregnant Chick's fisherman husband because he was off filming Deadliest Catch and couldn't have done it. But in classic Rizzoli & Isles writing, of course he took a little lifeboat to shore to trek down from Canada, killing his alibi (see "Money For Nothing" for comparison...)

But he didn't kill his wife. Of course it had to be the crazy lady with an aching and barren uterus.
*What a disappointing use of hand sanitizer:

And this baby needs to move out of the way:

They are seriously an adorable couple:

Maura and Jane's "Mother Bear" instincts coming out...

Maura pulls the "You have to kill me to get to my baby!" while Jane goes with the classic "Bitch, I'll shoot you in the face unless you back up off."
*And after a hard day's work on a case, the first thing to do is to get naked with your girlfriend:

And what better way to flirt than to throw a little mud?