On the heels of panel discussion led by four LGBT students (all of whom I love) at BYU, but also unfortunately on the heels of another gay LDS suicide is this:
I almost wasn't in this. In the planning stages of the video, way back in October/November, I had an internal debate of whether I should be in it. After I filmed my portion in December, for months I debated whether or not I should email the amazing man in charge of compiling the video and making it beautiful, and tell him I just can't be in it. I seriously had a few sleepless nights over it where I thought, "ML, you ignorant slut! It doesn't get better!" And every time I would think, "No, this is a good thing." And I thought of my Twitter followers and my blog. Because it's one thing to anonymously spout things off about what I believe in and to say I care about an issue, but it's another to actually publicly stand up for what you believe in. And I do not like the relationship that my two communities (the LGBT community and the LDS community) often have. I mean, that's why I picked the name "MormonLesbian" for my blog/Twitter/etc. (well, I'm also uncreative). I wanted to help bridge these two communities and make at least one person think, "Not all Mormons are bad." or "Not all gay people are bad." So, to make a short story long, I decided to just be in the video. Even though I'm still a little nervous about who in my life sees it, not gonna lie.
And then I watched the video. And I immediately thought three things:
1. Why am I standing like that? It gives me a double chin...
2. I'm sure we are going to get flak from Mormon extremist jerks (Sons of Liberty, *cough*), but I really don't see how they can watch that video and not feel the Spirit and see that these are some really amazing and good people. I really do think they are the ones that need to pray more and read their scriptures, not us.
3. Well, it wasn't really a thought, but I was just really happy. And proud of all of my adorable friends in the video. Seriously, they are amazing.
Anywho, watch it again!
Also, I want to start blogging more regularly again. Any requests for future posts? :)
16 comments:
food post.
you know from my fatface that i love to shove food in my mouth. and from my fatfacebook that i take pictures of my food like an asian.
i've been thinking about starting a food blog called vegging out. because i'm almost a vegetarian. almost.
like i have a pack of beef, chicken, and pork in the freezer for emergency... but the last month or so. i think i had bacon like once. its so weird.
Thanks for "coming out" and sharing this video. As a former BYU student who wasn't nearly as aware and open as you, I appreciate your courage. As a retired high school counselor, I know how valuable this affirmation will be for many students, LDS or not, wherever they attend school. I have re-posted it on my FaceBook page with the hope that my FB "friends" will gain some added compassion and understanding. Thanks to you all!
"you know from my fatface that i love to shove food in my mouth. and from my fatfacebook that i take pictures of my food like an asian." This made me laugh so hard. Also, bacon doesn't count as meat because it is amazing.
And thanks for sharing the video!!!
more ncis recaps please :) pretty please with a sundae on top and also your spectacular rizzoli and isles recaps :)
P.S. *hugs* thank you for your part in this video
So I have known about this video for a while, and have just now taken the time to watch it. thanks for posting it, and for being apart of it.
But I don't think that you ever said "It gets better" does it? blog about that.
I loved your NCIS recap posts and the awesome quality Kate Todd screencaps ;)
I've been meaning to watch that vid for AGES. And now that I have ... I feel so peaceful and kinda teary. :')
I'd eagerly look forward to posts, no matter what it's on :P
been coming to your website for a long time now. I am French and I live in Paris. I had absolutely no problem with my coming out, my mother already suspected it and my friends too, so I didnt really break he news to them ...
But I wanted to tell you how respectful I am when I watch this video. Reminds me that other LGBT students may not be as lucky as I was. This is very brave and shows your inner strength !!!
Thanks for doing this !!!
So proud of each person who put this video together. It is a shame that there tends to be such a tragic trend in the LDS community that homosexuals will be banished to hell, that there is a strong fear that they will be rejected by family, etc. I am so glad to see that there are such strong Mormons who have the conviction to be themselves, while also continuing to feel as though they can continue to embrace their religious beliefs as well - all without compromising who they are. Stay strong, and know that your genuineness will never fail you. I always have found some strength in the saying "it is better to be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not." Keep up the great effort to spread the word that it is OKAY to be yourself, and to love yourself for who you are.
So this video made me cry in the best way possible. I'm 19 years old, Mormon, and having a really hard time reconciling the fact that chicks are hot with everything else I believe and I just really needed this today, thank you for being in the video and thank you for posting it and thank you for making your blog title so straightforward so that I could find it with a quick and desperate google search for girls like me. Thank you.
lesbian photo video
Please post more! I just stumbled across your blog, am lesbian, Mormon and married ... and I struggle. A lot. I feel like there are not enough gay women voices in the church! Please, please :)
Just remember : God hates you.
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